Newsletter #13 – It’s The Language You’re Using… Trust Me!

Newsletter #13

March 18th, 2024

It’s The Language You’re Using… Trust Me!

Welcome back!

So, to kick off today, and if it’s OK with you, I’d like to touch on 3 things, before we dive into the main topic.

1. An interesting piece of information, but last week’s newsletter received the MOST replies of any newsletter yet!

It seems that the question ‘Does your what match your how‘, struck a chord with many of you, and based on your replies, it essentially held a mirror up to your goals vs the workload you’re currently putting in to achieve them. Sometimes these things don’t match up.

Like I said in the newsletter, there was no judgment here, and it wasn’t about being ‘world-class’, it was just bringing the question forward for something to think over.

I’m glad it resonated. Great result 🙂

And thanks to those that took the time to write back. I appreciate it.

2. Earlier in the week I sent out a Newsletter giving all my Newsletter Subscribers (YOU) a $20 discount on my ‘Key to Double Stroke Mastery’ course, as a way of saying thanks.

Its lucky newsletter #13 this week, so this is my way of having a mini celebration.

Just enter ‘MASTERMIND’ at the checkout to receive the discount. (This will be active for 3 more days, so don’t miss out!)

3. We are in the 4th and final week of my March ’30-day Mastermind Drummer Coaching Program’, and for those interested, you can now secure your spot for the MAY intake, here. Spots are limited.

Any questions, just ask, otherwise you can hear more about the program here.

OK, as you were. Now, on with the regular broadcast.

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So, as I was saying earlier…

Its The Language You’re Using… Trust Me!

Today I want to offer some very practical advice, and talk about the power of language.

Specifically, I want to dive in to the power of the language we use on ourselves, and how slight adjustments can cause massive changes.

At all times, we have a smaller version of ourselves, in our heads, rambling away about god-only-knows-what.

This is your inner-voice.

Our inner voice is interesting, as at any given moment it can swing either way in terms of whether it’s actually on our side or not.

When it’s great, it’s great!

Example :

‘Little inner Stan to big outer Stan’…

“Stan, you really crushed that lesson”

Result? Well, I walk away feeling a million bucks!

But when it’s not, it’s not…

“Stan, have you even picked up a set of sticks before? What the hell was that? That was awful.”

Result? Well, at that point I wonder whether I should pack it all in, buy some rural land, and just raise geese instead. (Geese are funny.)

That’s how dramatic things can get.

I know you know EXACTLY what I mean. And I know you deal with this, too. We all do.

Self-talk controls quite a lot, whether we realise it or not.

For such a little person, that little version of ourselves has sooooo much power and authority over us.

It has the potential to manage the macro of our lives – the big questions (like, should I raise geese?), and just as much of the necessary and much more micro day-to-day tasks, too, e.g. why exercise when I can just do f*ck all instead?

I mean look, that little inner Stan nearly had me packing it all in to start raising geese! GEESE!!! (Geese are still funny).

So, before we get to the main point here, (don’t worry, it’s coming), let’s discuss the power of that pesky voice a little more…

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You have to understand, the brain is just a computer.

Well, I shouldn’t say ‘just a computer’. It’s a pretty dam amazing and powerful computer.

But with all that is said, this computer has been gathering data and locking into systems and routines ever since the moment you were born.

This is great, obviously, because our brain power is literally the reason that we find ourselves in the situation we are in now, as the dominant species on this planet.

Our computer is the reason you’re sitting there now, safe, able-minded, on your couch, phone in hand, living your best life.

This is truly fantastic, and not something to ever undervalue and not be in awe of. (At all times I try to show gratitude for the things we often take for granted), BUT we are still very much at the mercy of that powerful little computer, too.

Did you know the conscious brain can process 40 bits of information per second?

That doesn’t sound too bad, right? 40! Nice work Mr. (or Ms) Conscious Brain.

Hang on, don’t pat yourself on the back just yet, let’s put that in perspective, up against the mighty subconscious brain.

The subconscious brain can process a modest 11 million bits of information per second.

That’s a big jump. And although it’s clearly helped us in many ways to get to where we are now, it is also the cause of some problems, too.

So, let’s look at this from my perspective…

I’m 40 this year. (Another crowd gasp!!!)

I know, I know, I don’t look a day over 23, and you’re fascinated by youthful grace and vitality, but let’s keep this on track…

So, for 40 years now, my subconscious brain has been taking in up to 11 million bits of information per second!

Wow.

That’s a lot of information getting processed and stored in my meat-sack-of-a-hard drive, and WITHOUT me even being aware of it.

Now, without even pulling out the ol’ tinfoil hat, it really does emphasise how powerful and effective social conditioning could/can be, without even realising it.

In some ways, we are sort of screwed.

Drama, conflict, entertainment, consumerism, sugar, vapes, alcohol, surface-level distractions… All these things trigger our basic little ‘quick-gratification’ monkey brains, and all this stuff hits our subconscious daily, keeping us from finding our TRUE potential.

It can be a tough ride.

It makes me think of the famous Bill Hicks sketch…

“Go back to bed, America. Your government has figured out how it all transpired. Go back to bed, America. Your government is in control again. Here. Here’s American Gladiators. Watch this, shut up. Go back to bed, America. Here is American Gladiators. Here is 56 channels of it! Watch these pituitary retards bang their fucking skulls together and congratulate you on living in the land of freedom. Here you go, America! You are free to do what we tell you! You are free to do what we tell you!”

Such a great bit.

Now, I know that was a little heavy-handed, but if you know Bills work, you’ll understand the common thread and appreciate the mention.

(For my younger audience, check out Bill Hicks on YouTube.)

But anyway, even though the subconscious takes in so much and we are so susceptible to it all, not all hope is lost.

Firstly, just having awareness is key.

There is a lot of talk in the psychology and neuroscience space about how your thoughts heavily impact your environment.

They say that thoughts are so powerful that you should choose them consciously and carefully.

Dr. Joe Dispenza is someone worth looking up. He works in the field of neurology and psychology, but comes at it with data and stats, which often helps as there is more than just feelings backing up his theories.

So… Yes, this makes total sense to me. In simple terms, if you don’t want bad things to happen, then just don’t think about bad things… Right?

Well, kind of, but not quite.

Yes, we get it, the power of positivity etc etc. That definitely holds some weight here, we all know that. I’m all for it.

I get that idea in the basic sense, but man, it’s also not very realistic either.

Let me put it this way…

Do this for me right now, right here.

DO NOT think about a purple elephant.

See, you can’t help yourself. I fed you the idea, and you had no option but to think about it. It was too late.

That’s how easily our thoughts can be hijacked and derailed.

But! There is another way, too.

The meditation practice of mindfulness is about how we can just observe our thoughts and feelings, and not attach to them. So essentially, just viewing your thoughts and feelings like a car driving past, and not so much being a victim to them.

We HAVE thoughts. Yes. But we are NOT our thoughts, and certainly not at the mercy of them.

This idea resonates very deeply with me as it gives the power back to the individual, aka YOU, and helps you feel less crazy in the process, too. Great!

The point being that we all have weird, strange, odd, and sometimes negative thoughts from time to time, but that’s just the computer spewing back pieces of jumbled up information that it’s been gathering all this time. And information we most likely took in subconsciously, too.

That actually makes total sense to me.

We now have a choice.

We can hold on to those good thoughts, the thoughts that are driving up in that sweet sweet Red 71’ Corvette Stingray.

And the bad thoughts? Well, considering they rolled up in that grey, and slightly worn down 2013 Mazda Premacy, we can just let them keep on driving by. Bye!!!

We aren’t them, they aren’t us, and we don’t even need to acknowledge them.

So, that little voice that we spoke of? The little version of ourselves, in our heads, crapping on and critiquing your every move, we can just let them say what they have to say, and then move on. We DO NOT have to actually take any of it on board… unless we choose.

Doesn’t that sound sweet!?

And remember, like I said earlier, our brain is just a computer with a hard drive, so not only can we choose to just observe that inner-voice, we can actually program it too!!!

And that’s what I wanted to start digging into here…

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So, back to the headline of this newsletter…

‘It’s The Language You’re Using… Trust Me!’

I want to give you a tip, something that I literally use on a daily basis, and it just took a slight adjustment in the language I used.

It’s what I call my ‘non-negotiables’ list.

So what is it?

Well, it’s a macro list of daily tasks that I consider to be ‘non-negotiables’ tasks, meaning, it’s not an option as to whether I do them or not.

Using the term ‘non-negotiables’, instead of something like ‘ my daily tasks’, puts the adherence much higher for me as they now fall into a category of someone else asking me to do these.

We’ve moved away from our daily autonomy, where we just move by impulse and feelings, and have essentially given ourselves an internal ‘boss’ that we need to answer to, as not doing these ‘non-negotiables’, is not an option.

This is my daily ‘non-negotiables’ list that I have in my phone –

I do these EVERYDAY, rain, hail, or shine.

Keep in mind too, this is a macro list. It’s looking at the big picture, not the details.

For example, I wrote :

Exercise

And not :

5 sets of push-ups, 4 sets of pull-ups, a 45 min run etc.

Don’t worry about the details on your non-negotiables list, as that’s not the point of it. This list is just about showing up in some shape or form, and ticking it off daily.

Look, some days are better than others when it comes to the time we have available, so it’s just about doing something, rather than nothing, and still feeling fulfilled.

Some days I can read 100 pages, and sometimes I can only read 2, but because it was on my non-negotiables list simply as ‘read’, I feel great either way, and feel I’m moving forward.

I really recommend giving this a go.

Open up your notes on your phone, write at the top ‘daily non-negotiables’, and just add some important daily macro tasks that will help you move forward, by your own standards, and then see how you get on.

You might be pleasantly surprised. 🙂

Well, that’s it for this week.

Lots on at this end! I have gigs with my band Black Comet coming up, lots of drum clinic prep to do, a ton of 1on1s, oh and my Coaching Program too. Alls going well 🙂

Cheers everyone.

And just remember…

It’s The Language You’re Using… Trust Me!

As always, I appreciate you taking the time, and your feedback, too. I read and reply to all of them.

Stay Hungry, see you next week.

Stan