Newsletter #7 – Your Feelings Are The Problem. Trust Me.

Hot take, I know. But it’s true.

Don’t worry, I know exactly what I’ve done here. It’s meant to read like that.

I mean, it reads as though I’m saying that having feelings is bad, right? Well, I’m not.

Of course I’m not!

These sorts of opinions can be a little dicey in this day and age, as they are quite triggering, and can come across as inflammatory.

Is it supposed to trigger you? Yes, of course!

Is it inflammatory? No. If it was, you’re projecting that onto it.

Now, do I think that feelings can be a problem? Yes, 100%.

They actually cause most of the daily problems we face.

(As the vinyl scratches off the record player)

Woah. Woah. Woah…. Take 5. Timeout ref!

Ok. We’ve started off pretty strong here. I know. Sorry.

All cylinders are firing already, so maybe we need to just take a second or two, and set the mood a little better.

Let’s start this again.

Hi friend. How are you?

That’s good. I’m really glad to hear that.

Did you get that thing done you were meant to get done?

No? why? You said you would!

It’s already February!

Well, anyway, get onto that. You don’t want it to pile up.

Ahhh. There we go. Feeling a bit better now?

How’s that coffee cup going down? Need a top-up?

Actually, forget the top-up. Let’s go back one step further.

Do you need to know how to make a good cup of coffee?

Well, how about we go back in time and get ‘little Stan’ from a few years back, to show you how to whip up a tasty brew HERE, using the trusty MoccaMaster batch brewer. Haha.

Yes, in my other life, I did all the customer training for my coffee company ‘Rumble Coffee Roasters’, back in Melbourne.

I very much enjoy the process of what it takes to consistently create a quality cup of coffee. I always have.

It’s a ritual for me.

And not to derail this intro even more, but the MoccaMaster in particular, is by far my favourite way to brew and drink coffee, here at home.

I love it. I love my setup –

The only difference between that video, and now, is that I brew much, much weaker these days.

For example, in the video I explain that the coffee to water ratio is 60gms to every 1Litre of water.

This is the industry standard ratio for any filter-based coffee brew method.

So, 6gms per 100ml, 12gms per 200ml etc etc.

(That’s just a little tip, from me to you)

Whereas now, I brew more like 20gms for every 1.25Ls.

That’s a big drop-off.

Essentially, I brew more like ‘coffee tea’ these days.

Why?

Well, I’ve realised in recent years I don’t actually need the caffeine. It turns out I’m already pretty jacked up naturally, it seems.

What I love is the ritual of making coffee, and the shared experience it can bring, too.

The act of making my morning coffee is super important to me.

I wake around 4:30am.

I then brew a pot of my favourite beans, light a candle, and read my book for the next hour or so.

(Oh, and by the way – I just finished Arnies new book too – ‘Be Useful : 7 Seven Tools for Life’. It was ok. I give it 6 / 10. Anyway, back to it…)

Nothing sets up my day better than this.

NOTHING.

There are many theories and ideas out there on what is the best order in which to approach your morning routine. Especially from the perspective of being a ‘creative’.

The books on this exact topic seem endless. I know, because I’ve found and read a ton of them, but there are still more!

But through my research, what I’ve found is the order in which you choose to do things in the morning is actually VERY specific to you.

It’s trial and error, plain and simple. The work needs to be put in.

You need to do the work to crack your code. There is no other way.

A great book on this subject is ‘The 5am Club’, by Robin Sharma.

Robin recommends –

Wake : 5am. Then straight into –

Exercise : 20mins

Study : 20mins

Reflect : 20mins.

Robin makes the case that the first step is to move – to perform vigorous exercise for 20 minutes.

And what’s really important is to make yourself sweat too. That’s because sweat gets rid of cortisol, the fear hormone.

Sweat generates a protein called BDNF, or ‘brain-derived neurotrophic factor’, which actually repairs brain cells and accelerates the formation of new neural connections.

So by simply sweating for 20 minutes, first thing, it literally means you’ll think faster! Haha.

Amazing stuff. Science is rad.

20 minutes on each is fine, but I would definitely just use that as a starting point.

I think the goal should be 30 minutes on each, and if you really want to become an A++ student, work towards an hour on each.

I’ve experimented with my morning routine A LOT! Purely because I’m obsessed with cracking MY code, and finding out what makes me tick.

What I’ve found is my best morning routine for optimum results is –

Wake : 4:30am

Read : 4:40-5:30

Write : 5:30-6:30

Run/exercise : 6:45-7:45

This really sets me up well. And that’s quite a lot accomplished before we’ve even hit 8am.

It’s great because not much can derail me at that point.

Now, let me guess… You don’t have the time? No worries at all. I can help there.

It’s simple… CREATE IT! Just create some more time.

You’re welcome! I know, it’s genius!

Earl Nightingale, a radio broadcaster from the 1950s, and one of the early pioneers of ‘personal development’, famously (and controversially) stated that getting up just 1 hour earlier, 5days a week, and putting that time towards a new skill or interest, will give you an extra 240 hours a year towards that interest.

That’s the equivalent of 6 x 40hr work weeks a year, potentially on a new endeavour that could literally change your life.

An exciting prospect, right? It’s amazing when you think about it.

Now, I call this controversial, because whenever I share this online, (which I have done numerous times now), people lose their minds. Seriously.

The idea that you’re ‘creating an extra 240hrs’ in your year, really rubs ‘average Schmo’, the wrong way.

Schmo, loves average results, and this idea flys in the face of that.

I mean, how can ‘average Schmo’ stay average, if I’m out there spewing an ‘above average’ approach to living?

“This is dumb, you’re not creating time, you can’t do that. You’re losing it in the evening. That’s not creating more time.”

Fair enough, Schmo.

“The results of your life reflect the standards you’ve set.” – Robin Sharma

Now, if this IS controversial to you, firstly, I empathise with your way of thinking, I really do. You’ve actually lost the race before it’s even started, and that’s a shame.

Secondly, I implore you to consider the FACT that the potency of 1 hour in the morning, first thing, before ANYTHING has infiltrated your world, is MUCH more beneficial than an hour at the end of your day (especially from a creative, focus, and learning standpoint), after 14hrs of being bogged down by life, your responsibilities, and the days distractions in general.

I can promise you now, next to NO ‘flow state’ is kicking in at 8pm. And guess what, ALL modern neurological data is now backing this too.

Initially, this idea was just anecdotal, but now science supports it, too.

There is a reason why countless successful people openly express the value of early mornings, backed with a solid morning routine. Quite simply, because it works.

It’s not ‘rar rar’. It just works.

Just remove your feelings on the topic, take the advice, and then take action.

Start following the bread crumbs. Or should we say, follow the coffee beans?

It’s undeniable that success leaves clues.

Now, back to what I was saying about your feelings being a problem here…

Why?

Well, because you’re letting them get in the way of living your TRUE self. The person that you can see and hear inside, the one that’s screaming to get out.

Your feelings are getting in the way of –

A. Setting a clear vision of your purpose

B. Making a plan to fulfil that purpose.

C. And then taking action on that plan.

How?

Because, in simple terms, your feelings should never come into the conversation when it’s in regard to showing up daily for the tasks and goals you’ve set yourself. NEVER.

Everyone wants to move forward in some shape or form. I don’t care who you are and what you do. Everyone wants to progress in some capacity.

But so few do.

Strange, right?

You could wake up with the most intense gusto you’ve ever experienced, and I mean like your sails are up, and you are flying full steam ahead with true intention towards the day. And then…

Ol’ mate ‘feelings’ shows up unannounced, walks through the door, (uninvited as always), with that classic line that they ALWAYS say…

“You know what? I don’t feel like it.”

Really? You don’t feel like moving forward? You don’t feel like showing up a little more on and off the kit? Rubbish.

But feelings are pushy. They are overbearing. They are dominating, and they have way too much control over us.

And THIS is my issue with them.

They are important, yes, but they drive the ship way too often, and in the wrong areas, too. They are often the cause of your goal getting derailed.

What a bummer, right?

Having the energy and desire to make true change in your life is an absolute gift, and then to have someone just stroll in and say something simple like “I don’t feel like it”, causing the whole thing to fall apart?

It’s actually madness.

Feelings are good, but they are like a wild horse, and need to be tamed.

Set your expectations on yourself, and start showing up…

Rain.

Hail.

Shine.

Now, when ol’ mate ‘feelings’ shows up again, (as they will), just say –

“Not today man, I’m good thanks. I’m on a mission much bigger than the power I usually give over to you. I appreciate you, yes, I need you, yes, but not in this capacity, and not right now.”

I’ll say too, it’s not actually ol’ mate ‘feelings’ fault, they are just doing what they do, and are sometimes just a little misguided. Like we can all be, I guess.

We just need to keep our eyes on the prize, accept that everything good in life is ‘slow-burn, long-term’, and just keep showing up.

And most importantly, regardless of how we FEEL.

Your Feelings Are The Problem. Trust me.

But guess what, they don’t have to be.

In the words of Captain Planet, “The Power is Yours!’

Stay hungry, see you next week.

Stan

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